One of the questions I am most frequently asked during my year as president of the Austin Young Lawyers Association is how I manage to do “it all.” I am not entirely sure what “it all” includes, but I do know that I put my all into what I am able to do. I have been engaged in leadership and volunteer work since middle school, and as I leaned into my legal career, work naturally took priority over many other aspects of my life. As new chapters began, however, it never crossed my mind that I needed to close chapters that already meant so much to me simply to start another.
Family planning comes with significant pressures and stigmas, particularly for women. My husband and I did not have a specific plan; we simply decided that we wanted to grow our family. I was not willing to stop everything I had invested my time and energy into for a process that was largely out of our control. It took longer than we anticipated to grow our family, and those long-awaited months filled with tests and hope likely would have been far more difficult had I isolated myself from the leadership and volunteer work that brought me purpose and fulfillment.
There were times when I needed to slow down and prioritize rest, especially postpartum. During that period, I discovered the invaluable support of friendships and community through connecting with other parents and working parents. When I was ready, I knew I did not want to choose between being a mom, a leader, and a volunteer. Not working was never an option for our family, and continuing to stay engaged outside of work remained important to who I am.
I also want to acknowledge that my ability to stay involved while working and “momming” is supported by circumstances that are not universal. My children were and are healthy, we are able to afford childcare, and I have a supportive parenting partnership with my husband, who understands that leadership and service are integral parts of my identity. Every family’s situation is different, and many parents manage extraordinary challenges while doing their best for their families and careers. They are nothing short of miracle workers.
For women in particular, navigating work, family, and leadership presents unique challenges, as we continue to face heightened expectations and doubts about our abilities. The pandemic revealed that flexibility is possible, but evolving workplace expectations—whether inoffice, remote, or hybrid—remain a moving target. Childcare costs, school schedules, summer breaks, and the logistics of daily planning add layers of pressure to already demanding professional roles. When combined with the requirement to meet billable hours and professional obligations, the result is a complex balancing act. If you have ever seen my planner, you know it is full—often with appointments, deadlines, and the occasional doodle from my daughters.
I recognize that my continued involvement in leadership and service is a choice, and that some may perceive it as time taken away from family. In reality, my interest in leading and volunteering grew alongside my heart with the birth of my children, fueling a desire to help make the world a better place for them. Through leadership and service, I have learned that meaningful impact does not require large financial contributions; it requires making time and choosing to show up. Even the smallest acts of compassion can create ripples that grow into meaningful change within a community.
I also want my daughters to see both of their parents modeling service and civic engagement. When possible, our involvement becomes a family effort. While my children are still young, I know there will be many opportunities in the future for us to serve together. One of my primary goals this year has been to emphasize that leadership and service through organizations like the Austin Bar and AYLA should not require members to choose between professional engagement and personal responsibilities.
It would be unrealistic—and hypocritical—to expect perfect attendance or uninterrupted availability from members when family and work obligations inevitably arise. AYLA has intentionally created family-friendly events that allow attorneys to include their families and chosen communities. I believe that evolving local bar organizations to offer opportunities that integrate family, networking, and service is essential to supporting and retaining working parents as members. No member should feel forced to choose between family, health, and career to remain engaged. I am so proud that our local organizations are evolving to function as communities that support, not shame, one another when members need to step away. Delegating responsibilities, appointing multiple committee leaders, and encouraging connection help shift the expectation from always being present to being fully present when possible.
Another key factor in my ability to stay involved has been the ongoing work of establishing and maintaining boundaries. I have learned to say no when necessary and to communicate as clearly and proactively as possible. Each of us has different capacities, and honoring those boundaries begins with communication. While it has taken years to build these skills, clearly expressing what is needed—to attend a meeting, participate in a networking event, work late hours, or schedule a playdate—has made sustainability possible.
There are, of course, difficult days filled with deadlines, exhaustion, and the occasional tantrum. For Austin Lawyer readers navigating demanding practices alongside full lives outside the office, my hope is that this perspective offers reassurance rather than a prescription. Our legal community is strongest when it recognizes that engagement, leadership, and service do not require perfection or constant availability, but rather intention, flexibility, and mutual support. When we extend grace to ourselves and to one another, we create a more inclusive, sustainable profession—one that allows us to serve our clients, our community, and our families well.